Style Etiquette

How to convey a positive message with body language

Crossed arms

Dr. Albert Mehrabian says that body language speaks the truth when the words lie. And when we cannot find consistency between verbal, vocal, and visual, then the facial expressions come to the rescue, helping us to interpret the emotions behind the gestures.

Reading people’s body language can lead us to many interpretations, and we can only make the correct assumptions if we connect the posture with nonverbal cues such as facial expressions.

Crossed arms posture is considered a negative body language that sends a message of insecurity, defensiveness, or anger. The truth is, crossing arms at the chest can have a variety of meanings, from comfort to concentration and confidence to anxiety or shyness.  For example, we cross our arms when we feel tired or cold. It is a natural gesture that gives us comfort and self-assurance.

Crossed arms have a powerful impact and send a message to others around us. So, let’s see a few positive reasons why some people may cross their arms at the chest:

To come up with an answer

How many times have you found hugging yourself when you were thinking of how to find a solution to a problem?  Leaning back on your chair with crossed arms, you take the time to contemplate and find the answer. It’s a posture that engages both your left and right brain that stimulates cognitive function and helps you focus better.

To build presence

Usually men use this power stance, or superman pose, crossing their arms to impose with their presence looking bigger and authoritative. But also, women have adopted this posture by placing both arms on the armrest with a genuine smile to help them make a powerful presence and project confidence.

To mask insecurities

We crossed our arms when we are in an uncomfortable situation, and we try to restrain our feelings as a sign of taking control of our emotions.

Most people take the arm shield posture when they have to do something that they don’t want or like. For example, staying in the doctor’s waiting room or facing a controversial conversation, chances are you may take this posture to comfort yourself and restrain your frustration. It doesn’t have the hostile gesture of blocking, contrary to show self-restraint.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does crossing your arms always mean you are defensive?

No, although crossed arms are often read as insecurity, defensiveness, or anger, the gesture can carry many meanings, from comfort and concentration to confidence, anxiety, or shyness. We naturally cross our arms when tired or cold, simply because it gives comfort and self-assurance.

How should I interpret someone's body language accurately?

Body language can lead to many interpretations, and correct assumptions come only from connecting posture with other nonverbal cues, especially facial expressions. As Dr. Albert Mehrabian observed, body language speaks the truth when words lie, and the face helps us read the emotion behind a gesture.

Can crossed arms actually help me think?

Yes, leaning back with crossed arms while contemplating a problem engages both sides of the brain, stimulating cognitive function and helping you focus. It is the pose many of us naturally take when working out an answer.

Can crossing your arms project confidence rather than insecurity?

Yes, the power stance of crossed arms has long been used to build presence and look more authoritative. Women have adapted it too, placing both arms on the armrests with a genuine smile, which projects confidence and a powerful presence rather than hostility.

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